Satan Returns

This isn’t really a Donnie Yen movie in the way Donnie Yen has been presenting himself in the last five or ten years. There is nary an open shirt, motorcycle jacket or MMA throwdown in sight.

Mirror’s Edge

Frustrating, flawed, and fun; sometimes infuriating, sometimes breathtaking. I can’t think of a game that would more accurately reflect the character of many of the movies I end up championing.

Stoner

I had to watch this movie more than once to verify that George Lazenby actually has more dialog than just, “Hmm? Hmmmmm,” mumbled with that smug chin-in-the-air look as if to say he has discovered something important and must now jut forth his chin and stroke it slyly. Who the hell does he think he…

Devil’s Dynamite

A movie that awkwardly tapes together a turgid underworld drama with a movie in which a laughing Caucasian thug and a Taoist priest use gyonshi to battle a dude who sometimes, for no reason that is ever explained, transforms into a space-helmeted, silver foil clad “Futuristic Warrior.” Oh, and also sometimes…ninjas!

Gymkata

If you are familiar either with me or with my work on this site, it probably comes as no shock that I rank Gymkata as one of the most valuable players on an amazing and occasionally sparkly team. I’ve been pushing this movie on people for decades, armed at first with little more than my…

Think Fast, Mr. Moto

“Mr. Moto is a very difficult fellow to kill.” — Mr. Moto 1937’s Think Fast, Mr. Moto, starring Hungarian actor Peter Lorre as a witty, karate-chopping Japanese man of mystery, introduces us to the budget films version of Charlie Chan. It seems that the specific nature of Mr. Moto changes as the series progresses, and…

Dragon Lives Again

World, you spoil us. No matter how much we’ve seen — and we have seen a lot — you always have something else waiting in the wings to delight and make jaws hang slack. Martial arts films are especially fecund soil for stories that operate in the far margins of loony concepts, made all the…

Chandni Chowk To China

If there’s a target audience for a movie starring both Mithun Chakraborty and Gordon Liu, I’m it. Literally.

Mercury Man

He can use this force to pull himself through the air, almost as if, oh, as if swinging from, let’s say some kind of web. Like a man who possesses some of the characteristics of a spider, perhaps.

Silver Hawk

Then there’s the fact that Wolfe manages to sell 100 million phones in about a week, and just how is Wolfe planning to control all the folks who prefer their Motorolas..?

Protege de la Rose Noire

This isn’t really a film at all, but more of a game of dress-up that a couple of 12-year-old girls with access to their mum’s wardrobe might have.

Hero Dream

I’m at a loss. I never thought I would say something like this, but the scummy Hong Kong action film Hero Dream was almost TOO sleazy for Teleport to review. Almost…