Escape from The Bronx

“In the near future.” More times than not, it’s a euphemistic way for a science fiction film to say, “We were too broke to afford interesting sets.” Setting a film in “the near future” is a great way to get around a variety of stumbling blocks, not the least of which is a low budget.…

Let’s Jet Set!

Whether you are driving along the Amalfi Coast or setting out to map a tributary of the Amazon, everyone knows the most important thing to prepare before departure: your soundtrack

Stoner

I had to watch this movie more than once to verify that George Lazenby actually has more dialog than just, “Hmm? Hmmmmm,” mumbled with that smug chin-in-the-air look as if to say he has discovered something important and must now jut forth his chin and stroke it slyly. Who the hell does he think he is? Mr. Bean? He does have a few other lines, but for the most part, he just hums through the whole movie. I know this isn’t the best way to kick off a review, but come on! Speak, damn you! This isn’t Quest for Fire.

Devil’s Dynamite

A movie that awkwardly tapes together a turgid underworld drama with a movie in which a laughing Caucasian thug and a Taoist priest use gyonshi to battle a dude who sometimes, for no reason that is ever explained, transforms into a space-helmeted, silver foil clad “Futuristic Warrior.” Oh, and also sometimes…ninjas!

Last Resting Place of the Frito-Lay Magician

Not too long ago, whilst back in my home town of Louisville, we went on a brief late-afternoon sojourn to the city’s historic Cave Hill Cemetery, of which we shall make mention many times in the future. The cemetery is well worth an entire day spent exploring it, but we were running late and looking…

Spacehunter: Adventures in the Forbidden Zone

Look, I never said I was proud of the things I liked when I was kid, alright? And I’m even less proud of some of the things I watched now, some twenty years later, all excited about realizing how stupid they are only to realize that while, yes, they are pretty stupid, I still don’t…

Desert Sands

As has been and will forever be apparent, I harbor an epic number of obsessions, fetishes, and curiosities that provide me nigh endless material for exploring and exposing to the public. Among the ones that have yet to be mentioned is a fondness for movies about the French Foreign Legion. Not the modern one, with…