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TITLE DESCRIPTION TAGGED AS
GEN X COPS Today's obnoxious young criminals must be combatted with equally young and obnoxious cops! OR so it goes in this lame-brained but surprisingly fun Hong Kong actioner that manages to appeal to a new generation of fans without completely annoying the old school. , , ,
GHOST IN THE SHELL II: INNOCENCE Ghost in the Shell II: Innocence and Patlabor: WXIII made the arthouse circuits around the United States at more or less the same time, give or take a year. Close enough for atom bombs, anyway. Both were received well by critics. Innocence was received well by fans. Patlabor somewhat less so, for a number of reasons. Chief among those reasons would be that Ghost in the Shell enjoys a much higher profile in the United States, either because the darker cyberpunk edge is more appealing to American fans, or because it features a hot, nearly-naked cyborg chick with a huge rack (of guns, I mean), while Patlabor has the merely cute, fully-clothed Noa Izumi. , , ,
GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS! It would only be a matter of time before we once again saw Elvis frolicking on the sands of Waikiki in those little swimming trunks that were so popular back in the day. , , ,
GLADIATOR I know Oscar award-winning films are hardly our forte here, and that many of our readers are predisposed to dislike or avoid a film that garners such accolades. But Gladiator is the rare film that is worthy of its hype. Any fan of epics, of war films, of old sword and sandal movies, of good old-fashioned movie making, should give it a try. ,
GOBLIN What happens when a bunch of horror fans get their hands on video equipment? A lot of people get their guts ripped out in a silly but ultimately impressive shot-on-video splatter film. ,
GODZILLA'S REVENGE Thrill as a young lad in mini-shorts travels to faraway Monster Island and gets emo with Minya while watching Godzilla kick some serious stock footage tail. , , , , ,
GODZILLA: FINAL WARS Yet another "final" Godzilla film! Collect 'em all, kids! Cult film director Ryuhei Kitamura assumes the franchise reigns and promptly decides he's more interested in making another spinning, flying, posing kungfu film than he is in doing anything with Godzilla or the whole host of other monsters he throws on screen for a few seconds here and there. , , ,
GODZILLA VS. GIGAN Godzilla teams up with Angilas the giant hedgehog to battle a cyborg with a buzzsaw in his belly in this, one of the most hated Godzilla films of all time. Not surprisingly, it is one of my favorites. , , ,
GODZILLA VS. HEDORAH Godzilla squares off against a giant sludge monster born of man's pollution in the weirdest damn Godzilla movie ever made. , , ,
GODZILLA VS. MECHAGODZILLA Godzilla faces off against his baddest foe in the most bad-ass Godzilla film ever made. It's the 1977 version, not the new one. , , ,
GODZILLA VS. MEGAGUIRUS The Big G tackles a big bug while ineffectual scientists and military guys shoot missles and black holes at him. It's a wonderful return to action-packed, brightly colored 1970s form in this Godzilla romp! , , ,
GODZILLA VS. MEGALON A giant beetle and a returning Gigan square off against Godzilla and his Jack Nicholson looking robot buddy as two muscularswingin' bachelors and their little boy in microshorts look on while we are invaded by an undersea race of people who wear skimpy togas and glitering tiaras. Hmm, must be the 1970s! , , ,
GOLDEN BAT Golden Bat is in many ways typical of the type of films Sonny Chiba appeared in before he became an international action star. Under a long term contract with Toei Studios, he racked up an impressive slate of low budget B movies during the sixties, a good number of kiddie-themed science fiction films among them. His turn as Iron Sharp in Invasion of the Neptune Men, as well as his starring roles in the Toei TV series Nanairo Kamen and Ala-no Shishai, also made him a veteran of the costumed hero Tokusatsu genre of which Golden Bat is squarely a part -- though in Golden Bat he was, for once, spared having to be the guy in the silly super hero costume. , , , , , ,
THE GOLDEN BUDDHAS Hong Kong's Shaw Brothers answer the call of James Bond and come up with a film that falls pretty short, yet stands up well alongside many of its Eurospy contemporaries. When a friend is killed, a judo-powered businessman on a trip to Thailand must lock horns with beautiful female assassins and a villain in a gold lame jumpsuit and cape. , , ,
GOLGO 13 Sitting down to watch Golgo 13: The Professional for the first time in years, I was shocked by how closely the life of the titular globe-trotting assassin reflects my own. Landing in Malta or some other exotic location, shooting some scumbag, collecting my fat wad of cash for a job well done, then heading to my loft in an undisclosed location to make sweet love to whatever woman caught my eye when I was busy pounding down scotch at some seedy strip club bar where I was telling the other broads trying to grab my attention to, "Hit the bricks, baby" -- man, I've been there. , , , , ,
G.O.R.A.: A SPACE MOVIE So then I'm perusing Turkish movies online when I stumble across the second legit Turkish DVD release that I've ever seen. The first is The Man Who Saved the World, and the second is G.O.R.A. And I read that it's a science fiction comedy, and it came out in 2004, and allegedly it was the highest-budgeted Turkish film ever, and... well, I had to see it. ,
GRAPES OF DEATH Rollin's zombies showcase certain obvious characteristics of zombies as defined by the George Romero movies that have become more or less the de facto zombie rule handbook. Some of them shamble aimlessly about with their arms in awkward positions. They like to bite people. And their bodies and faces tend to decay and fester with oozing boils. But they also like to stab people with pitchforks, brandish torches, travel at a relaxed jog, and prepare dinner. , , , ,
GREAT YOKAI WAR Great Yokai War was conceived not so much as a remake as it was a celebration of the original film's 40th anniversary. Rather than acquiring the services of a tested children's film director, rights holder Kadokawa Group decided to snag grindhouse shock auteur Takashi Miike as director, a move that may remind some of you of Toho's decision to put cult film fave Ryuhei Kitamura in charge of the 50th anniversary Godzilla film. , , ,
GREEN SNAKE Tsui Hark directs this tragic fantasy starring Joey Wong and Maggie Cheung as two snake spirits trying to live in the human world, where uptight monks keep hassling them. Will the snakes find true love? Will the monks get over their hang-ups? And what about those weird pig-men and scampering demons? , , ,
GYMKATA 1984 Olympic Gold Medal Gymnast Kurt Thomas enters a game of death and fights using gymnastics while Richard Norton dons a furry vest. This is what life is all about! ,
HANUMAN AND THE 7 ULTRAMEN On I encounter films whose WTF quotient is so high that they exist on a plane beyond simple judgments of good or bad–the mystery of whose very existence overshadows any questions of quality. Hanuman and the 7 Ultramen is such a film. And like another fine example of the species, the Turkish superhero mash-up 3 Dev Adam, Hanuman achieves that rarified WTF air by means of positioning some very familiar elements within a very foreign context. , , , , ,
HAUSU Collectively these girls inhabit a world straight out of a seventies Saturday morning cereal commercial, one in which people rise to greet the day with arms outstretched to the sun as cartoon rainbows play across the horizon to the strains of treacly soft rock. As Obayashi presents it, you wouldn't be at all surprised if one of those freaky psychedelic football mascots from Syd and Marty Kroft's PuffnStuff or Lidsville were to bound into frame at any moment. Oshare’s life outside of the group, however, is presented a little differently, though in no less cavity-promoting terms. , , ,
HERCULES VS. THE BARBARIANS This review is now part of our Unleash the Hordes feature article. , ,
HERCULES VS. THE MONGOLS This review is now part of our Unleash the Hordes feature article. , ,
HEROES SHED NO TEARS John Woo's early, shockingly gory, blood-soaked nihilistic tale of a group of mercenaries on the run from vicious drug-dealing soldiers. , ,
HIGH CRIME Enzo Castellari and Franco Nero, working with Dirty Harry as their inspiration, established the template for both the look and attitude of the genre that would soon become known as poliziotteschi, or simply enough, tough Italian cop films. , ,
HIDE AND CREEP I think what warms me most to the characters in this film is that they are Southern, sort of goofy, but not in any mean-spirited sort of way. After decades of films that revel in trashing Southerners, I'm happy when a film like Hide and Creep plays things a little friendlier. There are plenty of stupid characters, but they're not stupid because they're Southern; they're just stupid because they are characters in a horror film. And they are Southerners not because the filmmakers thought it would be funny to make them Southern. They are Southern because the film was made in the South, by people from the South, who probably mostly knew other people from the South and got them to be in the movie. ,
HONEY BRITCHES A Bible thumping moonshiner and his sexy jailbait backwoods bride cross paths with idiotic big city thieves.
HORROR EXPRESS If you miss the days when horror and science fiction, while not exactly being intelligent, were at least willing to play with lofty ideas and theories and mix them together with charm and drollness, then by all means hop on board the Horror Express. , ,
HORROR OF DRACULA Christopher Lee isn't a man or a monster so much as he is a barely contained forced that overpowers anything with which it comes into contact. He is strong, towering, and above all, menacing. When Christopher Lee as Dracula shows up, you believe with every inch of your soul that's he going to put the serious hurt on you, not ask you to waltz or listen while he reads some verse to you. , , , ,
H.O.T.S. You know, this movie has put in a bad mood, now, which makes it even worse. What kind of wacky sex romp puts you in a bad mood? I'm going to have to go watch Bruce Lee pull out Chuck Norris' chest hair just to make myself feel better. ,
HOUSE OF FURY House of Fury is a more modern look at the nuclear kungfu family, and while its look and style have been updated for modern sensibilities, the core message at the center of the film remains consistent with the many that came before it: the family that trains in kungfu together will deal out swift kungfu vengeance together. ,
HOUSE OF THE DEAD 2 Yet another sequel nobody demanded! But at least Uwe Boll doesn't return as director of this half-assed zombie action film, though when "not directed by Uwe Boll" is your biggest boast, there's still plenty of room to screw up. ,
HOWLING II: YOUR SISTER IS A WEREWOLF I have no reasonable explanation for my addiction to this film. At least heroin makes you feel good for a little while. I garner no pleasure from my addiction to Howling II: Your Sister is a Werewolf. There is no benefit to me in staying up until three in the morning yet again just because Howling II: Your Sister is a Werewolf happens to be on. And yet there I am, never the less, Howling II: Your Sister is a Werewolf on the television, a tumbler of bourbon in my hand to help dull the pain, and a deep-seated loathing of myself gnawing away at my very soul as I catch myself tapping my foot in time with that horrid pseudo new wave band that appears in the opening scene. , , , , ,